Men Are Gold Diggers Too

Still got energy to party. Young handsome man in sunglasses eating pizza and holding joystick in his hand while lying on sofa in messy room after party

Don’t get me wrong, sometimes, as men, we need assistance. Overwhelmed by circumstances beyond our control, we set aside our pride, humble ourselves, and ask for help—we’ve fallen victim to life and one of its hurdles and like any other person stuck in moment, we need a hand to hold on to, and that hand is usually the hand of the one that loves most: our girlfriends and wives.

But that type of man is different from the one I’m about to talk about: the male gold digger. This is a man who, although he is healthy and fully capable of taking care of himself, he doesn’t. Somewhere along the line he’s discovered that a woman will cater to him if he plays his cards right. Whatever he cannot afford, she will pay for. Whatever he doesn’t care to do for himself, she will do for him. He doesn’t have to be committed to her or monogamous to reap the benefits. He just has to keep her close enough to exploit, but far enough to keep his options open. He uses her car more than she does. She spoils him with her paycheck more than she spoils herself. Buys him Jordans before she buys herself new heels. Buys him new games for his PlayStation before she stocks up on her makeup. I could never be him but sometimes I catch myself thinking, “It must be nice!”

There is nothing wrong with a man letting his woman pamper to him. However, there is a difference between letting your woman cater to you and exploiting her. There is a problem with letting your woman spoil you while never making a sincere effort to reciprocate. I’m not saying a man should match his woman dollar for dollar, deed for deed. I’m just saying some people should learn to receive without exploiting and give without expecting—a concept the gold digger, male or female, can never comprehend.


Kwapi Vengesayi is an Amazon bestselling author whose books explore captivating musings and thought-provoking conversations about love, relationships, life and our human experience. You can find his book on Amazon. You can also follow him on Twitter @kwapiv or subscribe to his blog at